I had to go to my girlfriend's funeral today. It was a blessing to be able to talk with some of her other friends, but we all shared the same feelings of loss and helplessness.

I tried to move on and celebrate the wedding I had hoped to be with her at that evening, but it wasn't at all as I'd hoped. The only thing that I can figure is that the Lord knew that if we had married I would have not been able to have taken this.

I dreamt of her -- naturally. I asked her, "Are you really dead?" and she answered "Yes, I am."

Mood:  incredulous
I learned that yesterday, about ten hours after the prophesy, my friend killed herself. I tried to love her, tried to encourage her to hope rather than to fear, but it was not enough. I suppose no man can make a woman happy, but it shouldn't be so difficult, should it? We're told that men and women were made to love each other. We must have an enemy that really hates that.

Mood:  quizzical

I went on a Franciscan day of recollection today. The most memorable thing that happened whappened after the retreat had ended. A woman came up to me and said, "The Holy Spirit told me to tell you that you will find peace."

I was quizzical about what that might meant but it became clean over the next few days.

Today I finished my editing and then volunteered at our parish fishfry, after adoration and staying for stations afterward.

I watched "Eregon" today -- for free from the DVD store. It was a typical S&S tale -- with dragonriders. I would have enjoyed visiting Pern again better, I think, but it was entertaining as far as it when. It felt like it ended at part one though with the evil sorcerer-king undefeated. I had read the Lord of the Rings and Chronicles of Narnia stories so I knew that they are series. I should have researched "Eregon" a bit more before viewing, I guess.

I turned in my monthly crossword puzzle today and worked on demolition and ended the day by working on some editing, another hierogamous day.

Today was taken up with the Vincent Price marathon on the movie channel, two classic Dr. Phibeses. He certainly was a creative mass murderer. One could almost admire his dedication and creativity -- almost. The way he eats and drinks through the side of his neck and talks through mechanical devise makes him a sympathic character. It's too bad that he kills. He apparently stops killing by the end of the sequel, but then we thought he did after the first movie.

Earlier I watched an old episode of "Outer Limits", "The Guests" based on a Charles Beaumont story. The Drifter doesn't get the girl (who was like in "Lost Horizon" actually very old), but he -- and the alien -- did learn to love and free the Guests from their entrapment. 

After nearly a year since our last date I called my SO again. We talked and prayed together. "It was good, very good." (Gen. 1:31)

Today was a hierogamous one, including a funeral, the film "Thundersbirds" (set in the distant future of 2010!) and updating on my 200+ page chronology.

I watched the rather strange film, "JC in the Hood". It told the story of four souls destined for hell. They even seemed to have died in their sins. It was worth sticking through until the end however since they were all given a second chance. It was as if Jesus rewrote thier tragic life history. The replaying of the same scenes over and over did reduce the cost of making the film, I'm sure, but did get boring along the way, especially after the pattern was established. It certainly did give a graphic portrayal of the seemingly hopeless situations that many Blacks find themselves in and shows them that there is Hope, and His name is Jesus.